Monday, March 26, 2012

My Fantastic Horrible Day

My Fantastic, Horrible Day
Tragedy

Author's Note:
In my literature group we all were asked certain basic like "Pick a type of clothing" for all of our answers we all had to try to use as many as possible with making sense and no having random things happen in the writing.

It was March, the month of our anniversary, I think he might propose, anything is possible when your waking up to the birds singing and the sun coming up and shining through your window giving my room the extra heat that it desires. I slither out of my bed like a snake, and slip on my largely fluffy robe, as I'm moving down the stairs and into the kitchen like a robot, I grab a bowl of cookie crisp and begin to brew coffee. The coffee breezes through my throat craving for more. Once I start sipping instead of chugging it down I remembered my dream from last tonight. Tonight is going to be a big night. It was my boyfriend Calvin, and me's 3 year anniversary, and all my friends thought he was gong to propose, so I needed to prepare.

I hoped into my car and started the engine, which is always a good feeling turning the car key, and suddenly feeling in control. With the leather chair underneath me supporting my destination. I'm cruising through the streets, and I pull off to the local market. Finally, I got to the store and it's already one o'clock and the dinner is at five, so I have time to spare. Aisle by aisle I looked for things I need for tonight. Most of them were all just food, which I didn’t need because we were going to go out for dinner tonight. My face begins to go from a smile into a frown because I can't find what I'm looking for. All I can find is food, random kid toys like alpacas and platypuses which leaves me nowhere, so I start heading out of the store thinking might as well get mints, you never no what your going to eat. I'm in the check up line and across the way I see the most cutest orange tank top ever invented and I knew I had to have it. Also, it was Calvin's favorite color which was a total bonus. I grab the shirt and go back in line and drift off about my night. How he would come in being all romantic giving me roses, and how we would live happily ever after. We'll have our honeymoon and bike around in a very tropic area with a beautiful waterfall as the background. Then, I saw three kids Carmen, Nick, and Rosalie. I snap back to reality and I'm disappointed to not have that as my life. To be living in a crowned, and loud city like New York, but it's okay soon that life will come. As I'm leaving the market I look up at the sky and then the sunlight takes an exit.

Once I get home I realize that I still haven't taken a shower or cleaned anything so I knew I had to get moving. Feeling the steamy hot shower bounce all over my body, giving it a boost of energy. I dry myself off with a smooth, warm  towel. I dried off my body, and then starting putting on all of my new clothes, fitting to my body.  Next step was for me to put on my mask, the mask that covers all of my blemishes.

 Finally I'm done. I cruised down the stairs and pressed play on the voicemail box. I listen as it says "Three new messages, first message sent Wednesday at 2:47 PM… Hey Carly! Its's Jessica I wanted to know if you wanted to go to the movies on Friday, it's at 9 o'clock. Bye!... End of message. Next message sent yesterday at  11:03 AM… Hi Carly! It's your big sis calling to let you know there's a family dinner mom put together and your part of the family! It's Next week Sunday and It's an open house dinner and lunch. Hope to see you there, Bye!... End of message. Last message sent today at 4:30 PM…Hi Hun, It's Calvin... I'm incredibly sorry, but I can't come tonight. I didn't want it to end like this at all, but I think you’re a great person, but just no the one for me, Again I'm sorry. Bye… End of message. No more messages." My heart sank to the ground. I've been waiting for the night what felt like forever. I wanted to take a hammer to my head because I was stressed, angry, and sad. My life has flashed before my eyes and my night comes to a tragic ending . I feel alone and isolated. My home which is filled with love and care goes to creepy and ghostly.  I look outside and notice the weather changed once again from dark cloudy, to thunder and lightning. I start asking myself why is this happening to me? Did I do something wrong?

I walked back up my room almost crawling, and tears drip down my face. Crushed by the man who loves me, or loved anyway. I walked outside to my balcony and just stayed there because to me there is no point in living anymore.

12 comments:

  1. This piece had a great feel to it, and it felt really sad. This could certainly happen in real life, and it was great to read. I do think you might of been able to use the words more efficiently, but other wise, great job.
    ~Redmon

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  2. I liked the piece a lot. I liked the twist at the end.Nice transitions. Very well written.

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  3. I really liked this piece, it perfectly followed the Tragedy mode. It was started happy and there was a tragic flaw, and fall and then ending with a death symbolism. I really liked it, although there were a few grammatical errors.

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  4. I really like how you used your vocabulary and metaphors to better visualize how the character feels. Great twist. A couple spelling errors, but those are easily fixed. Great job.

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  5. I really love how you tied this story together in a way that no one else did. You structure this cool romance into a tragic mode, using the symbols to get the effect you want. Your writing is so much more prolific. Excellent progress. I would recommend going back and looking at revision that still needs to be done.

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  6. I agree with Mr. J, I liked that tragic mode that you used. I also enjoyed your word choice. Great Job!

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  7. I like this story, and I didn't even notice the words they fit in so perfectly. In the story you can kind of tell what is going to happen at the end.

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  8. You did a awesome job incorporating all of the words in your story. This is one of the stories that I have read that did not fell random to me. Very good job!

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  9. My Fantastic Horrible Day: I really enjoyed your story. It looked like you used every word in the right way. Also, I like your beginning of the piece. You had very good description and it added a nice boost to your story. Great job!

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  10. So heart breaking. I love the plot and everything about this piece. I can tell that you put a lot of effort and thought into your work. You used the words and made a piece that was completely different from any of the others. So original!

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  11. I really enjoyed the story, I liked how you incorporated the words into your story. It ended sadly but all stories can not end good. Your word choice was good. Great Job!

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  12. Wow I really thought this piece showed your dark side of writing. I love the way I could feel the feelings of the main character in my heart!! Sometimes it got a little random but writing things like this can be a challenge. Nice job keep up the great work!!!

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